0861 THEBEMED [email protected]

0861 THEBEMED

Thebemed Logo

Accessible Care . Affordable Prices

Thebemed Wellness Cafe’

Embrace change and dance with life!

Aug 30, 2018 | Blog, Emotional

Thebemed Wellness Cafe’

MENTAL AGILITY

BEING MENTALY AGILE – KNOWING WHEN TO ‘STEP IN’, ‘STEP OUT’, OR ‘STEP BACK’

Achievers respond to change by mentally exploring the dynamics of the new situation, and finding ways to make the change work well for them.

We can call such a response ‘mental agility’; the capacity to move quickly, subtly and sensitively to adjust to change. With mental agility you can optimize conditions to best advantage.

The key factor is knowing when to take action and when not. The right time to take action is when you have sufficiently strong influence over the prevailing conditions – then success is reasonably certain. It is unwise to take action when you have little influence over the prevailing condition – you are likely to be wasting energy. Often you can be so busy trying to force things to work in unfavorable conditions (like trying to braai in the rain) that you might miss other more doable opportunities (tried to braai in the fireplace?). So, mental agility includes knowing when to take prompt action, or when to let go and wait for a better opportunity.

EMOTIONAL AGILITY    

You don’t have to get bogged down in heavy emotional responses to change. Instead, practice emotional agility by acknowledging your feelings and finding ways to turn the ‘angst’ energy into emotional ‘glad’.

Dr Rachel Jack of Glasgow University has demystified, and thereby simplified emotions into four basic types of experiences. Now these emotional experiences can be more effectively dealt with to support you in dancing with the changes in life.

These days there is much talk about emotional intelligence (EQ). You can also relate that to emotional agility. This simply means being sensitively in touch with what you are feeling and doing something about it. You want to pay attention to the angst emotions, those that tend to wear you down. By doing so you can better work through the feelings, not to suppress or deny them, and take the following steps to resolve the issue and generate the ‘glad’ emotion.

These four basic emotions are:

A sense of fulfilment
The essential experience is of being grateful for having what is needed, holding positive expectations of getting what you want, being confident in your own abilities, and enjoying positive relationships with the others involved.
“I’m Glad!”
Relieved, Satisfied, Peaceful, Accepted, Content, Tender, Appreciated, Pleased, Happy, Enthused, Joyous, Loved, Excited, Ecstatic
A sense of being frustrated
The essential experience is feeling blocked in getting what you need or desire. There can be a feeling of being trapped in a situation over which you have little control.
“I’m Mad!”
Irritated, Frustrated, Interrupted, Distracted, Annoyed, Angry, Hostile, Hateful, Mean, Enraged
What to do?
Determine: What it is that you need or desire? Identify what is the situation preventing you from getting that, or is somehow standing in the way of achieving that? So, rather than getting ‘mad’, here’s a smart response:^ Express your feeling – but avoiding the tendency to blame^ Articulate the need/want and identify what is blocking it – bear in mind the real possibility that some of this could be your own internal block.^ Find sustainable ways of removing the block – get one with pursuing the positive intention with smarter choices.
A sense of loss
The essential experience is about losing something of value, or having lost something, that was needed or desired.
“I’m Sad!”
Disappointed, Alone, Heavy, Empty, Lost, Helpless, Rejected, Deserted, Grieved, Devastated, Depressed (meaning of life lost)
What to do?
Determine: What is it that you have really lost or expect that you are losing. Then:^ Do something creative about the situation in which you stand to lose something^ Determine fully the extent of the loss.^ Acknowledge that loss.

^ Grieve the loss.

^ Refocus on the good stuff and move on

A sense of disquiet
The essential experience is feeling consumed with negative expectations, your mind is full of concerns for the future – real or imagined. This includes losing what is appreciated, or even losing the sense of self (own life).
“I’m Scared!”
Concerned, Anxious, Nervous, Weak, Vulnerable, Fearful, Overwhelmed, Afraid, Terrified, Paranoid
What to do?
Determine: What do you really need to know about the worrying situation – get real, then:
^ Gather more appropriate information^ Act on the best available options^ Seek whatever help is available^Face what is real or imagined by walking through the experience to its conclusion

^ Look back from the other side – and learn

These four experiences can range from being barely discernible in one’s awareness, to being overwhelmingly distracting. The intensity of the experience determines the description of the emotion. Emotional agility is picking it up early enough to do something about it when you are still resourceful.


Was this helpful?

Latest Posts

Three simple habits: Pay off your debts – you can do it

Three simple habits: Pay off your debts – you can do it

It’s not always easy to save money. Once we have a few extra rands in our bank account, the temptation is strong to buy that new dress or jacket or splash out at an expensive restaurant. It may be hard to save, but it’s not impossible. What is impossible is to save money if you don’t have any.
Whether you are in debt and want to get back into the green, or want to start saving for a rainy day, here are some simple habits and tips to help you start saving money right now.

HIV/Aids: How we are winning against this disease

HIV/Aids: How we are winning against this disease

We’ve come a long way since HIV/Aids first showed up in South Africa in 1982. Unfortunately, due to a complex political history, we only really started addressing the problem in the mid-90s when South Africa already had the largest population of HIV-positive people in the world.

Are you degrading women, without realising it?

Are you degrading women, without realising it?

Those 20 000 women who marched to the Union Buildings on 8 August 1956, protesting against apartheid, knew this to be true. Thanks to them, and countless other voices, we now live in a world where there is more equality and freedom than 50 years ago. Thanks to these women who understood the power of their voice, and the power of their words.

Tips for a kinder festive season

Tips for a kinder festive season

It’s been a stressful year. In fact, it’s been a stressful two years! As we head into the holiday season, it’s important to take the time to not only reflect on a turbulent 2021, but also to focus on finding ways to slow down. Christmas decorations, shopping madness, carols on repeat, and general end-of-year craziness, can take their toll, often leaving you feeling overwhelmed and exhausted.

An attack on the vulnerable is an attack on the social heart of us all

An attack on the vulnerable is an attack on the social heart of us all

When violence is perpetrated against our mothers, sisters, wives and children, the whole of society suffers.
Act to seek out such suffering – it may be hiding in that very women or child in front of you. Fear and pain are hidden within victims of violence. They often tend to remain silent about their shame, pain and fear.

You May Also Like:

What COVID-19 has taught us about human connection

What COVID-19 has taught us about human connection

One thing we have learned from the COVID-19 pandemic experience is that we are not happy when we are separated from others – loved ones, colleagues and even people we do not know. We like to go to restaurants, coffee shops and just hang around people. Not only do we like it, but the pandemic has also highlighted how we need connection for our mental and emotional wellbeing. Sometimes it seems that it is only when things are taken away, that we learn to appreciate their value and importance.

read more
Baffled about boosters?

Baffled about boosters?

A common argument against COVID-19 vaccination is “Surely the vaccines can’t be effective if I require a booster?”
All vaccines work to train the immune system to recognise foreign invaders and produce antibodies that will attack them. But the strength of the initial immune response, and the amount of time the antibodies will last, varies depending on both the pathogen the vaccine is fighting, and the vaccine itself.

read more
Being in the dark

Being in the dark

We all know the experience when, at the crucial moment, the rolling blackout hits and bam, you are no longer in that meeting, or the piece of equipment you’re using cuts out mid-job. But we South Africans are creative people and have found ways to manage as best we can. Now, with the anticipated hike in electricity tariffs, we need to be creative about reducing our energy usage.

read more