Science clearly demonstrates that stress which is associated with excited engagement and achieving positive outcomes strengthens.
The opposite is also true. There is strong connection between the experience of negative stress and the depletion of body resources. The long-term effects of negative motivation will result in burnout. Similarly, in our engagement with others, using fear of punishment as a motivation breaks people down – using positive encouragement to achieve meaningful outcomes builds people up. Wherever you can engage positively with people you have the opportunity to influence things for the better.
Want to take action? Try this:
Instead of reverting to anger and scolding to let someone know that they have done something wrong, rather choose to let them know that their behaviour may have been unhelpful but that they are still valuable as a person.
Your wording could be something like this:
I appreciate ………… about you. I appreciate having you on the team.
Unfortunately I was disappointed when you …………
The standards that you need to uphold are ………….
Is there anything you would like me to help you with so that you can get up to standard?